THE TERRIBLE TRUTH ABOUT MUMMY BLOGGING.

I am in a constant state of puzzlement by the media's reaction, as a whole, to women who happen to have had children, who choose to write on the Internet. Call us Mummy Bloggers, like it is some sort of sneering, looking down the nose, patronising put down.

Whatever. 

I still prefer to be recognised as  a contraceptively challenged lady writer of the internets. But I know I cannot change any minds or perceptions regarding what it actually is that I do.

So I was thrilled when Annabel Candy asked if she would publish this on my site. 

Beware! It contains the truth.

Mrs Woog and her mate Penny Webb. Friends since primary school. 

THE TERRIBLE TRUTH ABOUT MUMMY BLOGGING.

It's a battle field. 

A dog eat dog world where women pit themselves against each other, fight dirty and stab former friends in the back. 

At least that's often how traditional media represents mummy bloggers. Headlines scream "Mummy Wars!" because good stories are based on struggle, battles and controversy, not happy endings, and the mummy blogging phenomena is nothing if not a great saga unfolding slowly in real time. 

In the mummy blogging world new characters are introduced on a daily basis while old ones write themselves out of the script because anonymity is easier than standing up for what you believe in when faced with criticism. 

Silence is safer than standing on a virtual soap box and speaking out. 

Three years ago, reclining in a business class seat on a flight from Sydney to Shanghai, I sat next to Brenda Gaddi. We were on a freebie, the tab paid by a fizzy drink company who had chosen to woo us because mummy bloggers rule the world. 

"So Brenda what do you want to do with your blog?" I asked as the plane took off. "What's your big bloggy dream?" 

"Well my big dream, my long-term dream," she said, pausing and sizing me up before continuing "is to organise a blogging event, a big conference for all the mummy bloggers." 

"Oh," I said politely, "that sounds nice." 

I was new to blogging, too wrapped up in my own life to share her vision. But a year later Brenda put her money where her mouth was and organised the Digital Parents Conferences. The first and second conferences went off with a bang but I couldn't attend them so it was exciting to make it to Sydney this year for the third Digital Parents Conference. 

I wanted to find out more about these mummy bloggers and why they do what they do. 

 It didn't take long to realize that this was a group of ridiculously self-assured beautiful and confident women. Women like Nikki Parkinson, Penny Webb, Karen Andrews and Kerri Sackville. Valerie Khoo gets an honorary mention in this category although I think she is the mother of cats, not kids. 

It was easy to see that these were some of bravest and boldest women in the world, women like Martine from Modern Parent, Rachel N from Mummy Muddles and Julie Seet from The Bumpiest Path who've suffered terrible loss or pain but are making the best of life and helping others. 

There were women with a vision like Joy from World Vision and Brenda herself. Then there were bloggers like Eden Riley, Mrs. Woog and Trae Flett whose blogs attract trolls and negative comments like a cow pat attracts flies, yet who refuse to shut up.

Women who were in equal parts crazy and loving, or at least it seemed that way to me because mothers with four or five kids were heavily over-represented. Women like Nicole Avery, Sophie Bone and Seana Smith with large broods who still make time to write their blogs and work hard for themselves and their families. 

These were women from all walks of life whose were all madly passionate, courageous and productive. These were women who were funny, honest and very real. Just like in any other industry the mummy blogging world may be competitive. 

Of course I want as many readers as MamaMia, as many comments as Mrs. Woog, as many freebies as Nikki Parkinson and as much recognition as Eden Riley. But these were women who had managed to overcome those baser human instincts. 

Women like Al Tait, Grace Titioka and Seana Smith who gave me so much even, in Seana's case, inviting me, a relative stranger, into her home and family so I could attend. 

So I didn't see any competitiveness or bitchiness. 

I know it's out there but all I saw was women supporting and helping each other. Then I realised the truth about mummy bloggers. 

I realised what makes them both objects of ridicule and a source of fascination. I realised that they are ruled and bound by love. Self love which gives them confidence to share their lives, love for humanity which makes them want to help others, and love for their families which drives them to make working from home a possibility. 

I saw that mummy bloggers cause controversy because they're deluded in many ways, fixated as they are on mad dreams fuelled by passion and love. Such scary emotions to those who don't have them. But passion and love are what drives mummy bloggers, passion and love unite us. 

That's the truth about us mummy bloggers and it's really not that terrible at all. Passion and love. That's what we're all fighting for.

Annabel's been riding a roller-coaster round the world since 1968. 
She's a web designer and serial blogger at Get In the Hot Spot and Successful Blogging. 
This year she dreamed up the ridiculous 52 Exercises quest and is trying a different exercise every week in the hope of ending her mid-life crisis. So far it's not working.