July 17, 2010

Saturdays with Saw Hole

Fresh back from her elimination from Australia's Next Top Model, Saw Hole is down but not out! She certainly wowed the judges with her unique catwalk and was certainly able to show them her personality through her photos, she just fell short of the height requirement.

Saw Hole discovered, during her time in the house, her natural knack for fashion design. Read through to find out how YOU can win one her her original designs.

She comes home to a plethora of problems from Woogsworld Readers, check out this one from Annette. And send your issue to mrswoog@hotmail.com.

Dear Saw-Hole
I recently got married and when we arrived back from our honeymoon, my older brother's girlfriend had kicked him out and he is now living on our couch. Not ideal and my husband hates it. He has been here for 5 weeks so far and showing no signs of moving out. He is not a good house-guest either.
Please help!

Dear Annette,
Congratulations on your wedding! There was a device developed for just this dilemma - Mortein Flea Bomb. http://www.mortein.com.au/pests_fleas.php (how funny is the image of the jumping flea). Let the bomb off and hopefully he will run back to his girlfriend's garage. However, Saw Hole doubts she will let him back in, so it looks like he is your problem.

BTW in the interests of gossip, he must have done something BAD to be thrown out. Saw Hole threw out an ex once (who BTW had a big crush on Mrs Woog) but he refused to come and get his stuff, which was sitting fumigated in the corridor, resulting in Saw Hole getting in trouble with the body corporate. Anyway if you find out what brother in law did please email Saw Hole at saw.hole@gmail.com. All in the interests of gossip, under the guise of female solidarity, of course.

What gets Saw Hole's goat is the fact he is not a good houseguest. Manners people, please. I gather his behaviour involves toilets (see Mrs Woog's battle against toilet seat abuse for tips), hair on soap and not assisting with housework. What a sod. It looks like your husband needs to undertake an intervention (Dr Drew style). Here are Dr Drew's tips for a successful intervention: http://www.drugfree.org/Intervention/Ask_Expert/Dr_Drew_QA.

Saw Hole likes interventions and hopes to participate in one soon. I hope this helps. Your hubby needs to hoick up his balls and tell your brother to get a studio apartment somewhere far, far away from you.
With Empathy,
Saw Hole.

PS Saw Hole has finally gotten her act together and found some bribes...ahem giveaways. To be the first to win a Saturdays with Saw Hole t-shirt, designed by Saw Hole, please post a comment about why you like Saturdays with Saw Hole. Winner will be notified in next weeks Saturdays with Sawhole.

BTW I like filth humour, as well as swipes at the NSW Labor Party, Tony Abbott and cashed up bogans, so perhaps use those topics as your inspiration. I also like Paul Keating and Mick Molloy.On the other side of the Pacific, I love Reese's Peanut Butter Cups,Samantha Jones, Dr Drew and Kathy Griffin. Things I hate include Tom Cruise, dirtbag John Mayer (you want sexual napalm? I'll take you to Vietnam and string you upside down near a busy intersection, you pathetic Vlad the Impaler look-a-like) and Nicole Kidman's forehead(ha ha, you guys get her, I am happy to pass). Angelina sucks too xxx
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