May 10, 2012

Kicking the Tooth Fairies Ass.

Mr Woog and I are notoriously bad when it comes to time to alert the Tooth Fairy that her assistance is required. Time after time, Harry would wake up and come in and tell us the Tooth Fairy had not visited. We would look at each other in blame. 


BUT NOT LAST NIGHT!


Jack has been wobbling his bottom tooth incessantly for the past 2 months, urging it to release itself from the pesky confines that are his gums. His baby teeth was not having a bar of it, even though his adult teeth had already grown up and were pushing the baby ones out so far they were sitting and a 90 degree angle from his head.


But they were packed in tight. Not budging. I had already start to consider putting together a dental fund. We were going to need a wad of cash.


Did I mention we were going to need a wad of cash for future dentist visits?

Freak show potential. Or some sort of shark exhibit?


Day after day, Jack persisted with the tooth wobbling. He wobbled on the way to school. He wobbled watching TV. He wobbled during ballet class, swimming lessons and in between mouthfuls at mealtimes. It was deeply unnerving.


But his persistence paid off, and bit by bit his tooth started to loosen up.


And then yesterday morning,  as he lay naked on his bed chucking a tantrum, his tooth popped out! A teeny tiny speck but a tooth nevertheless.




Mr Woog and I both knew that we had to remember to remind the Tooth Fairy to visit or hell would break loose come morning time. Jack told us that unless there was Fairy Dust, he would not believe the tooth fairy would have come. He told me this as I was tucking him into bed.


I came out and asked Mr Woog is he could go up to Coles and buy some glitter and he looked at me as if I had asked him to lick the end of a battery. So I put on my thinking cap.


I found the hat that Jack's Fairy Godfather St Murphy had given him for his birthday and unpicked a couple of dozen sequins from it. And I use the term unpicked loosely as I actually used a mother fucker knife to scrape those bad boys off in the manner someone might scale a fish. But I took them from the underside so no one would ever know.




This morning Jack woke up and I could hear his high pitched girlie squeals from my bed.


Mrs Woog 1. Disappointment and Shattered Dreams 0.

Is the Tooth Fairy alive and well at your place?
And what is the going rate for a tooth these days?





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