My darling Jack.
I am about as good at cooking brownies as you are at spelling the word. Stop lying to your teacher. I have never made brownies in my life. Not that I have not thought about it on occasion, when I am eating them.
Dear Cranky Lady in the Carpark,
You drive that massive Mercedes 4WD even though I suspect you have never been on a farm. I let you go in front of me and watched with slight amusement as you did a 342 point turn and then drop your token, losing it. I observed you pressing the buzzer for assistance, screaming at the non-english speaking attendant to let you out as you had to go and pick up your kids from school. May I suggest you not have such long lunches with your girl friends and get yourself a little lesson in manners, patience and grace, because girlfriend, you are coming across quite bitchy. Just saying.....
Dear Channel 9 News Reporter,
I too was shocked at whatever you were reporting on. It had something to do with a gun racket in the Sutherland Shire? Anyway, can you please email me (mrswoog@hotmail.com) and let me know where you reported from. $12.99 for a bottle of Villa Maria is UNHEARD of around these parts!
Dear Group of Protesters in the city yesterday,
I was moved by your stories and your faces. Ordinary people getting fucked over by an incompetent government makes my blood boil. You taught me something I did not know. Thank you.
Have you got a story on your phone?
Joining up with Edenland's Fresh Horse Brigade.
