A couple of years ago, it was about 9pm and everyone was asleep. I sat out on the back verandah with a cup of tea and my bible (or a glass of wine and a cigarette, I cannot remember) when all of a sudden a rat the size of a fox terrier dropped on me from the roof.
I screamed LOUDLY. Evidently I had pissed this rat off a lot and I was left shaken with a large rat scratch on my arm. It was terrifying. And I was also appalled that no one in my family came running to see whether I was ok. I rushed straight into our bedroom and shook Mr Woog. "I was just attacked by a rat!" and he told me to be quiet as he had to get up early in the morning. Asshole.
And that little incident was the beginning of feline ownership at WoogsWorld.
This week I got a parcel in the mail from my intern and friend Sawhole. It contained an iPhone case which on the back she had had inscribed......
RAT CUNNING WINS OVER BEAUTY AND BRAINS. EVERYTIME.
It is for me to take to BLOGHER next week. It will remind me not to take it all so seriously and to have fun. And not to be intimidated by mega bloggers with a merkin accents. I like it a lot.
I do not have beauty or brains, but I do have rat cunning. If there is an easy way out, I will take it. You cannot learn rat cunning. It is inherited. Both my parents have it. SawHole has it in spades.
My son Harry has rat cunning. He gave me a sheet of paper earlier in the week, proudly saying "Look what I have been chosen to do!" Music to a parents ears. Until I read it and found out that he was in an STLA (which stands for Support Teacher Learning Assistance, which stands for Your Kid Is On Struggle Street) So this morning I tracked down his teacher, The Unflappable Mr C, to see what was going on. Turns out Harry needs a leg up in writing (of all things) and was doing fine. Not to panic.
So I went to kiss Harry goodbye and he says "Mum, do not worry about it. It gets me out of maths....."
A clear example of rat cunning.
So my lovely reader, Do you agree that Rat cunning wins over beauty and brains every time?
